You may begin by asking if I harbor hopes that Carl Paladino will mount a rematch against Andrew Cuomo.
This question is unseemly. As a member of the political press corps, I endeavor to remain indifferent to the selection of candidates by any party. I am here to observe and report, allowing readers to carefully weigh the various policy proposals offered by aspirants — whatever their personal style or rhetorical elan, or lack thereof.
But I see where you're going with this. And you're right: While I am a professional, I am also only human.
So yes, asking me if I'd like to spend another election cycle in Paladino World is like asking the audience at a Shakespeare play if they'd like to see Sir John Falstaff out on stage again, a tavern wench on one arm and a flagon of ale in the other. He might not be the sagest political thinker in England — which is why his former protege Prince Hal drops him like a stone upon taking the throne — but oh mama, isn't he fun to watch?
Currently, Paladino's biggest role is with the regional theater of the City of Buffalo school board, where since his election last winter he has been like a bull in a china shop. Scratch that: He's like a bull who pauses periodically during his destruction of a china shop to post comments on Facebook and Twitter about the store's shabbiness.
But it's hard for a guy who took the national spotlight for his tea party-fueled 2010 storming of the state Republican castle to restrict himself to that piece of turf. Which is part of the reason why he has recently been talking about running for governor in 2014 on the Conservative line.
Paladino has an ultimatum for the state GOP: If its members dare to nominate an insufficiently conservative challenger to Cuomo, he'd be interested in leading a competing effort. This would surely split the anti-Cuomo vote in much the same way that GOP nominee Pierre Rinfret and Conservative Herb London guaranteed Mario Cuomo his third term in 1990.
In his stalking of the dreaded Republican In Name Only, Paladino seems especially wary of Westchester County Executive Rob Astorino, whose decisive re-election victory two weeks ago makes him the GOP's first choice to run against Cuomo — also its second, third, and fourth through 18th choices; Assemblyman Steve McLaughlin is No. 19, followed by Tom Dewey's ghost.
"Astorino has purposely avoided the conservative side of the party and hangs around with all the RINOs," Paladino recently told Robert McCarthy of the Buffalo News. "That southern Hudson Valley is all RINO country." (It certainly doesn't help that Astorino's very name contains the letters R-I-N-O, although it's probably too late in his career to legally change it to Rob Astoconservative.)
The state GOP can take heart from the fact that Paladino is so far criticizing RINOs and not Republicans in toto. Specifically, he hasn't gone after party Chairman Ed Cox, who has maintained a good relationship with him despite their 2010 disappointments.
You'll know Paladino is truly serious about cleaving the anti-Cuomo vote if he starts turning on Cox personally. For a sense of what that would sound like, pay attention to the way Paladino talks about the Republican leaders in the Legislature, Sen. Dean Skelos and Assemblyman Brian Kolb.
To Paladino, both men are at best spineless and at worst tacit collaborators in the progressive takeover of New York state, as evidenced by Skelos' support for Cuomo's NY SAFE gun control law and Kolb's milquetoasty response to the various scandals that have afflicted Democratic Speaker Sheldon Silver.
It doesn't much matter what Paladino says about Kolb, whose conference is dwarfed by the Assembly's Democratic majority. But Skelos is currently the only Republican leader with any sort of hold on the real gears of power in state government — albeit with the required assistance of the Independent Democratic Conference.
Paladino's antipathy for Skelos could do real damage to Skelos if the Buffalo Beowulf decides to launch a Conservative insurgency, and barnstorm around the state talking about how moderate Republicans are losers and surrender monkeys. It was, after all, a similar kamikaze Conservative effort that cost GOP Sen. Steve Saland his seat in 2012.
"If (Republicans) are going to lose anyway," Paladino said on Fox Business Network last week, " ... we might as well give another party a chance to lead."
And by "lead," he means "lose — but with style."
cseiler@timesunion.com • 518-454-5619